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I can be in 20 movies. But I'll never be an actor.

I feel your scorn and I accept it.

I was born with an adult head and a tiny body. Like a 'Peanuts' character.

Many of our soldiers are stationed at Camp Coyote just south of the Iraqi border. This is how you know we have a strong army, when you can actually tell your enemy exactly where your camp is and what its name is.

I'm not just a boy toy. I have feelings and dreams like anybody else.

I've been to Canada, and I've always gotten the impression that I could take the country over in about two days.

McVeigh's lawyer got him the death penalty, which, quite frankly, I could have done.

The nation of Dubai banned the movie Charlie's Angles because it's "offensive to the religion of Islam." Apparently, the religion of Islam is offended by anything without a plot.

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Quotes are a great way to motivate yourself or others. When we use quotes in our dialogue or in presentations we show people that we have learned from the wisdom of others and that we believe in what we are saying. We're not just sharing our opinion, it is how other's feel as well. So keep the wisdom of the past alive and recite some jon stewart quotes today.

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