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I thought 'Deep Throat' was a movie about a giraffe.
Bob Hope


The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit.
Somerset Maugham


I can resist everything except temptation.
Oscar Wilde


Boy, n.:  a noise with dirt on it.

Not Your Average Dictionary



I am fond of children - except boys.

Lewis Carroll


I don't think there's a punch-line scheduled, is there?  
Vince Lombardi

When I was a boy, the Dead Sea was only sick.
George Burns

Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.

Chili Davis


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Quotes are a great way to motivate yourself or others. When we use quotes in our dialogue or in presentations we show people that we have learned from the wisdom of others and that we believe in what we are saying. We're not just sharing our opinion, it is how other's feel as well. So keep the wisdom of the past alive and recite some hilarious short quotes today.

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