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Azoy tsebrecht zich dos kichel. - That's the way the cookie crumbles.
In other words, that's life, folks.

Es nisht di khale far a-moytse - Don't eat the challah before you've made the blessing
Don't have sex before marriage

Oy! Es falt fun di hent! - I've got the "dropsies!" (Everythings seems to slip out of my hands -- I keep on dropping things!)

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If you're going to eat pork...
This saying has a number of different endings, but they all mean the same thing: If you're going to sin, do it right. Enjoy it. Otherwise, what's the point? So, if you're going to eat pork: "...eat the best kind," "...get it all over your beard," "...enjoy it so much that the pork fat drips off your chin."

Lign in drerd un bakn beygl - Lying in the ground, baking bagels
Sisyphus-like hell, spending eternity making bagels you can't eat

Az men shmirt -- fort men!
Figurative meaning: When you grease the palms of the proper authority (i.e., bribe him), then you get what you need.
Literal meaning: When you grease (the axles of a wagon), then you can (readily) travel.
Explanation: The Yiddish word shmirn has two meanings - to smear grease and to bribe (grease someone's palm).

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