funny sayings 2

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

4 out of 5 voices in my head say go back to sleep

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.

It takes 42 muscles to frown and only four to extend my middle finger and tell you to bite me.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.

Say what you will about the Ten Commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.
 

It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives.
 

A day without sunshine is like, well, night.

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